Jumat, Desember 14, 2007

Why Is It Important to Improve Your self?

Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.” More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.- when in reality, the fact is, most people are more scared than us.

You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumanti. You think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could read thru her transparent mind, you would see a bunch of clouds of thoughts and you might just be amazed that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here alone?... Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I don’t like my ankles, they look too skinny… I wish I was as intelligent as my best friend.”

We look at a young business entrepreneur and say “Wooh… what else could he ask for?” He stares at himself at the mirror and murmur to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad would still work things out.”

Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and thinks of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation.

Sometimes, you notice that you have an irritating habit like biting off your finger nails, having a foul mouth, and you – of all people, is the last to know.

I have a friend who never gets tired of talking. And in most conversations, she is the only one who seems to be interested in the things she has to say. So all of our other friends tend to avoid the circles whenever she’s around, and she doesn’t notices how badly she became socially handicapped – gradually affecting the people in her environment.

One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in opening up with even the most gentle topics you want to discuss. Ask questions like “do you think I am ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound so argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore you when were together?”. In this way, the other person will obviously know that you are interested in the process of self improvement. Lend her your ears for comments and criticisms and don’t give her answers like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!” Open up your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to help your friend with constructive criticism that will also help her improve her self.

One of Whitney Houston’s songs says “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True enough. In order to love others, you must love yourself too. Remember, you cannot give what you do not have.

Before telling other people some ways on how to improve themselves, let them see that you yourself is a representation and a product of self improvement. Self improvement makes us better people, we then inspire other people, and then the rest of the world will follow.

Stop thinking of yourselves as second-rate beings. Forget the repetitive thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve got 10 more reasons to envy them.

We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life need not to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves.Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.

See...
Live your life...!

Your-7-days-program-to-self-improvement

I seem to lost count on how many times I've read and heard of celebrity marriages failing almost left and right. Not that I care (and personally I don't), it seems strange that we often see movie and TV stars as flawless people, living the fairytale life of riches and glamour. I suppose we all have to stop sticking our heads in the clouds and face reality.

There are many ways to lose your sense of self-esteem despite of how trivial it could get. But whatever happens, we should all try not to lose our own sense of self.

So what does it take to be a cut above the rest? Here are some of the things you can think and improve on that should be enough for a week.

  1. Know your purpose
    Are you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your truth north every time.
    This may seem tricky at first when you see yourself to be in a tight or even dead end. But there's always that little loophole to turn things around and you can make a big difference to yourself.
  2. Know your values
    What do you value most? Make a list of your top 5 values. Some examples are security, freedom, family, spiritual development, learning. As you set your goals for 2005 - check your goals against your values. If the goal doesn't align with any of your top five values - you may want to reconsider it or revise it.
    The number shouldn't discourage you, instead it should motivate you to do more than you can ever dreamed of.
  3. Know your needs
    Unmet needs can keep you from living authentically. Take care of yourself. Do you have a need to be acknowledged, to be right, to be in control, to be loved? There are so many people who lived their lives without realizing their dreams and most of them end up being stressed or even depressed for that matter. List your top four needs and get them met before it's too late!
  4. Know your passions
    You know who you are and what you truly enjoy in life. Obstacles like doubt and lack of enthusiasm will only hinder you, but will not derail your chance to become the person you ought to be. Express yourself and honor the people who has inspired you to become the very person you wanted to be.
  5. Live from the inside out
    Increase your awareness of your inner wisdom by regularly reflecting in silence. Commune with nature. Breathe deeply to quiet your distracted mind. For most of us city slickers it's hard to even find the peace and quiet we want even in our own home. In my case I often just sit in a dimly lit room and play some classical music. There's sound, yes, but music does soothe the savage beast.
  6. Honor your strengths
    What are your positive traits? What special talents do you have? List three - if you get stuck, ask those closest to you to help identify these. Are you imaginative, witty, good with your hands? Find ways to express your authentic self through your strengths. You can increase your self-confidence when you can share what you know to others.
  7. Serve others
    When you live authentically, you may find that you develop an interconnected sense of being. When you are true to who you are, living your purpose and giving of your talents to the world around you, you give back in service what you came to share with others -your spirit - your essence. The rewards for sharing your gift with those close to you is indeed rewarding, much more if it were to be the eyes of a stranger who can appreciate what you have done to them.
Self-improvement is indeed one type of work that is worth it. It shouldn't always be within the confines of an office building, or maybe in the four corners of your own room. The difference lies within ourselves and how much we want to change for the better.

Good Luck...
May God always be with you!

Kamis, Desember 13, 2007

Increase Your Abundance by Serving Others

One of the most powerful ways to increase the abundance in your own life is by giving to others. Though it may seem like a contradiction, the more you give away the more you’ll have.

How is this possible? If you give everything you have, doesn’t that leave you with nothing? How does the act of giving create a return?

The answer lies in our perception of a limited universe. Most of us have lived our lives under the impression that the universe is limited. Further, what we have is limited and if we take from someone else, we have more and they have less. If we give to someone else, they have more and we have less.

Most of us are not taught the reciprocal nature of the universe – which means we tend to get back what we put out. You may have heard that what you focus on the most expands, or that “like attracts like.” But pause for a moment and consider this in a broader sense.

You may be able to recall instances when you did something nice for someone and received a pleasant surprise in return. Likewise, if you harmed someone or took from someone out of greed, you probably received a negative consequence in return (even if it showed up later).

Think of the universe as a great big mirror. Whatever you believe, you will receive. What you do unto others you also do unto yourself. This is good news because you can use this principle to increase your own abundance in ways that also greatly enhance the lives of others.

There are a few important points to keep in mind, however:

1-Don’t serve others with an expectation that you’ll receive something in return.

If you focus on that, you are not serving with a truly generous heart, and the returns you get will be less than impressive. Instead, let the joy and gratitude you feel about helping others serve as its own reward – and it definitely won’t be your only reward.

2-Leave it up to the universe (Alloh SWT) to figure out how and when you’ll be compensated.

Dont assume that giving money means you’ll receive money back. It may be so, or your rewards may come in another form altogether. Don’t expect that helping someone today will result in a big payday tomorrow. It could happen, but it might not. Most likely, your rewards will arrive in such a way and at such a time that you never could have guessed – which makes them even more enjoyable when they arrive.

3-Don’t wait until you have a lot of resources before you begin to give.

Give now and give often – even if you don’t have a lot. In fact, the power of your gesture will be MUCH stronger if you don’t have a lot to give. That seems to make no sense, but what you’re doing is affirming that there is more than enough to go around, which means more will come back to you more quickly.

Once you start to give to others with a heart full of joy, you’ll realize that there is truly no such thing as lack and the universe has an unlimited ability to bless you with abundance and awe.

Please share this blog to the person who you care...

Angels

Barefoot and dirty, the girl just sat and watched the people go by. She never tried to speak, she never said a word. Many people passed, but never did one person stop. Just so happens the next day I decided to go back to the park, curious if the little girl would still be there. Right in the very spot as she was yesterday she sat perched on high, with the saddest look in her eyes. Today I was to make my own move and walk over to the little girl. As we all know a park full of strange people is not a place for young children to play.

As I began walking towards her I could see the back of the little girl's dress indicated a deformity. I figured that was the reason the people just passed by and made no effort to help. As I got closer, the little girl slightly lowered her eyes to avoid my intent stare. I could see the shape of her back more clearly. It was grotesquely shaped in a humped over form. I smiled to let her know it was ok, I was there to help, to talk.

I sat down beside her and opened with a simple Hello. The little girl acted shocked and stammered a hi after a long stare into my eyes. I smiled and she shyly smiled back. We talked 'til darkness fell and the park was completely empty.

Everyone was gone and we were alone. I asked the girl why she was so sad. The little girl looked at me and with a sad face said "Because I'm different."

I immediately said "that you are!" and smiled. The little girl acted even sadder, she said, "I know."

"Little girl," I said, "you remind me of an angel", she stood to her feet, and said, "Really?"

"Yes, ma'am, you're like a little guardian angel sent to watch over all those people walking by."

She nodded her head yes and smiled, and with that she spread her wings and said with a twinkle in her eye, "I am."

I was speechless, sure I was seeing things. She said, "And since you thought of someone other than yourself, my job here is done."

Immediately I stood to my feet and said, "Wait, so why did no one stop to help an angel?"

She looked at me and smiled, "You're the only one who could see me, and you believe it in your heart." And She was gone.

And with that my life was changed dramatically.

So, when you think you're all you have, remember, there is someone always watching over you.